It takes a lot to push yourself to your physical limit alongside a significant other. It takes even more to do so for 12 straight days in some of the country’s most unforgiving terrain. And yet that’s what Andrew Hamilton and Andrea Sansone did in July 2024, when they set the couple’s record for hiking all 58 of Colorado’s 14,000-foot peaks in a single, grueling push.
When Hamilton and Sansone first met on the top of South Maroon Peak in 2012, Hamilton was already a record-setting hiker, while Sansone was relatively new to high-altitude peak bagging. For years, he acted as her mentor. That kind of dynamic would spell disaster for some couples, but in Hamilton and Sansone’s case, the relationship thrived. Since then, the two have picked up a number of sports together, from mountain biking to pickleball. Here are their tips for navigating learning curves and skill gaps and using a new sport to strengthen your relationship.
Ease off the pressure: In his first marriage, Hamilton overencouraged his road-biking ex-wife to try technical downhill mountain biking. “You want to encourage, but you don’t want to push them and turn them off,” he says. “Everyone goes through their own growth.”
Learn at your own pace: Few partners learn at the exact same pace. One party will almost always be slower at building strength, developing skill, or overcoming certain fears, Sansone says. (That dynamic can also flip-flop over time as injuries or skill plateaus set in.) Be patient with your partner’s progress.
Be open to tips: Some couples get chippy when one partner offers advice. While the adviser needs to be kind and gentle with their delivery, the advisee also needs to be open to tips that can help you both grow, Sansone says: “It takes an open mind and excitement about improving and learning together.”
Communicate early and often: If your partner is doing something that annoys you—whether it’s complaining, moving too fast, or leaving you behind—tell them ASAP, Hamilton says. The earlier you address it, the faster you’ll find a system that works seamlessly for both of you.
Remember your why: Learning alongside a significant other can be challenging, but it can also be rewarding. “Remember why you want to do this together: Because it’s fun and exciting and something new that keeps your relationship alive,” Sansone says. “Keep that why at the forefront.”
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