Your mother was right when she encouraged you to stand up straight and put your shoulders back: Research shows not only do such subtle shifts in our posture help us feel more energized, they also boost our confidence.
How does body language lift your mood?
A 2009 study in the European Journal of Social Psychology showed that when people jotted down positive thoughts about themselves, they were much more likely to believe them if they were sitting upright than if they were slumped over. That’s largely because more than half of communication is nonverbal—and that holds true whether we’re communicating with others or engaging in self-talk, notes body-language expert Patti Wood, author of Snap: Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language, and Charisma.
One of the easiest ways to tap your “silent superpower”? “Open the ‘windows’ of your body by making direct eye contact and uncross your arms when you face the other person,” says Wood. “Modeling this friendly body language calms your nervous system and signals to others to reciprocate and let down their guard.” Keep reading for six simple strategies that’ll help you spark joy, radiate charisma and boost your can-do.
1. Increase self-esteem with a ‘power steeple’
“We lose confidence quickly when one side of our brain is on overload,” says Traci Brown, author of Persuasion Point: Body Language and Speech for Influence. “But when the left and right hemispheres are in sync, negative self-talk decreases dramatically.” Turns out the key to feeling calm and in control is at our fingertips, she adds. “Just take both of your hands and bring your fingertips together into a ‘steeple.’” Our hands are teeming with nerve endings that directly influence the brain, and when our fingertips meet, the sheer symmetry of this gesture helps bring the left and right sides of the brain together, decreasing our anxiety and boosting confidence.
2. Feel calmer with an ‘astronaut walk’
Cue calm quickly with a strolling meditation, suggests Michele DeMarco, PhD, author of Writing the Wrongs: A Guided Journal for Healing Moral Injury. “Try an ‘astronaut walk,’ which mimics the gradual, exaggerated movements of someone walking on the moon. These intentional steps help bring your mind and body into alignment, allowing you to focus on the present moment.” Try this for 10 to 15 steps. “Next, start walking at a natural pace, being sure to take small steps,” she says. “With each step, pay attention to lifting and setting down your foot.” Such mindfulness in motion curbs racing thoughts and helps you (finally!) relax.
3. Spot lies by looking for ‘invisible hands’
We’re hardwired to perceive an open palm—be it in the form of a wave or a handshake—as a mark of honesty, reveals Wood. That’s why if someone is lying to you, they may play a game of hide-and-seek…with their hands. “I call the palms ‘windows to the truth’—people unconsciously close them into fists or hide them when they’re being dishonest,” she says. In fact, they may suddenly put their hands in their pockets or place them under the table if they’re seated because it’s difficult to lie when their palms are exposed.
4. Exude strength by claiming your space
Whether you’re mingling at a holiday party or headed to a networking event, the way you claim your space signals you’re someone to be reckoned with. “If you can walk from the back all the way to the front of a room, for example, you’re showing, ‘this space is mine; I’m not afraid and I’m going to move right through you,’” says Wood.
Other mini moves with major mojo? “Just inching closer to someone with a tiny step forward may sound small, but it’s a powerful way to initiate a conversation and exert control,” she adds. “Even subtly leaning toward them while you’re seated at a table can shift the power dynamic in your favor.”
5. Foster stronger bonds with a ‘Taylor Swift Sway’
When we’re in a mental rut for too long, our neural pathways become almost “frozen,” making it harder to change course and spark motivation, notes Wood. The best way to break out of this sad stasis? Channel the audience at a Taylor Swift concert! “Lift your arms above your head and sway,” she encourages, adding that this simple back-and-forth movement boosts joy.
And if you can put on a few upbeat tunes and dance with a friend, all the better. “This is called isopraxism, the contagious mirroring effect that brings us in sync with others and elevates our experience, making us even happier,” explains Wood. We already know Taylor Swift is a force of nature figuratively, but now science proves it quite literally: The same isopraxism we experience at a concert is what makes birds flock together and fish swim together. And, most important, it makes us humans feel less isolated and more connected to each other.
6. Boost your mood with ‘Disney moves’
Simply put, where the body goes, the mind follows. In other words, even if we’re feeling down, we can lift our mood quickly with “up” body language, promises Wood. “Just open up your stance, uncross your arms, and lift your head and shoulders,” she says. “My favorite example of this is the body language kids show when they’re about to go to Disney World: Their heads are tilted back, they’re skipping and laughing; every part of them exudes upward motion.”
Unfortunately, that’s in stark contrast to adult life, which almost literally exerts a gravitational force on our mood. “When we’re hunched, looking down at our phones, we’re less likely to smile,” observes Wood. But when our body is buoyant, so too are our emotions. Simply looking up from time to time creates an invisible string, gently lifting our head—and our mood.
